There
are certain things in life that are always amazing to me. Watching
the first steps of a child is a sight to behold. Seeing someone with
Down Syndrome show unconditional love is beautiful. The beauty of a piece of art that is being created right in front of your eyes is unforgettable. Someone proving
that flatulence is truly made of flammable methane is truly
astonishing. Then there are the things that astonish me that are not
so pleasant. (Yes the flaming fart comment was supposed to be a
bridge between the two. You know you want to see that and not see it
at the same time!)
Recently
I posted the following on Facebook: Faith is like a tapestry. It can
be complex and intricate or perhaps simple yet elegant. However, like
a tapestry, it can be damaged, ripped, shredded and left in tatters.
How should we help one who's faith has been torn leaving only a hint
of what once was with only a few fluttering remnants remaining? Any
thoughts?
There
were many thoughts. Who'd have thought? Of the many comments – most
directed directly at me - some of them were quite insightful. Others
were sympathetic to the situation and curious about the outcome.
There were a couple that paraphrased the Bible and one that quoted.
There was one that I chose to take offense at.
Now let
me go on record saying that I do not believe anyone can offend
another. Only you can allow yourself to be offended. Someone else can
go out of their way to offend you and cause you all kinds of headache
and heartache; however, you are the one that allows that to happen.
That being said, I was offended!
I am a
Christian. There was a time in my life when I would have boldly told
you to which church body I subscribed and why it was more accurate
than any other Christian group. I saw the world in a very narrow
viewpoint and would not even consider the possibility that I might be
(gasp) wrong. Dana Carvey was very insightful when he created the
character of the Church Lady on Saturday Night Live. That is what
offended me. Not the skits. Those were incredibly funny in their
accuracy. Carvey said he based it on the women of his church growing
up. In case you were wondering he and I are both Lutheran.
What
offends me is people who who have a sanctimonious, holier-than-thou
attitude. One of the people who wrote accused me of leaving God. Now
I will admit to being mad at him from time to time, questioning how
he does things, and wondering why he lets bad things happen to good
people and good things happen to bad people. (I am in no way
referring to anyone in particular no matter what my ex-wife may
think.) But leaving God? I was angry that this person, who had been a
member of a church I had served, would have the audacity to accuse me
of that. She never really knew me when I was a pastor and certainly
does not know anything about me now and never was smart enough to
know she didn't know. I was offended.
But do
you want to know something? Keep reading if you do or stop if you
don't. I feel sorry for her. She will never know what it is like to
look at the world outside of her tiny theological point of view. She
will never see the beauty and the ugliness of the world because she
will never open her eyes. She will always rationalize her beliefs and
reject anything that may not fit into her narrow-minded mindset. In
the time since I walked away from ministry I have grown more than the
years I was a pastor. Seeing the world for what it is can be trying,
scary and down right humbling. The twist for me is that leaving
ministry is what I needed to do to become a minister. There is so
much more good I can do outside the pulpit than I ever did when I was
preaching. Caring for others in a way that I could never do as a pastor has been one of the ways my mind, heart and soul have been saved in the past three years.
I pray
that all the church ladies and church men of this world who make Dana
Carvey's character seem a documentary will come out from under the
theological rocks and make themselves useful instead of judgmental. Look at the world and help someone who is in need instead of being like the priest and Levite from the Good Samaritan. Stop being so concerned with attendance and committees and attend something outside the church or get on a community committee. If you truly have that faith you claim then stop looking at all the specs in the eyes of those around you and look long and hard at the log in your own eye that has blinded you to seeing that your faith without any action behind it is dead.
Just my
thoughts and now that I have exorcised this demon I'm not offended
anymore. Perhaps you are now.
