Help! I've Fallen and I Can't Get Up!

I remember watching those commercials for Life Alert Emergency Response. There was a little old lady who had fallen. Yes, I am one of the millions of jerks who laughed and made jokes about it! Give me a break I was only 21 at the time and couldn't imagine not being able to get up from a simple little fall! Or could I?

There I was at the bottom of a long flight of stairs trying to get the ringing out of my ears. The details after all this time are still a little fuzzy but I do remember an accidental acrobatic action that left me in a crumpled heap with a broken a bruised body. You see I had fallen and I couldn't get up. Mine was not in the bathroom but in a very public place. My left ankle, which I have never trusted since that day, chose the second step from the top of the stairs to sprain thanks to a poorly placed pad. And then the somersault assaulted me!

There are times in life when we hear that subtle little voice telling us it is time to slow down and take a break. Then there are other times where life breaks you to make you slow down. This was one of the latter moments.

When you lose faith in someone else is it sad. When you lose your faith in God is it tragic. When you lose faith in yourself it is almost impossible to get back up again. That is the real cry of “Help! I've fallen and I can't get up!” That day would lead to me losing faith in myself but it also lead to a type of rebirth of faith in myself.

You see I tried to get back up and go back to work after taking a day off to recover. Hey! Remember I was 21 and still indestructible. And then hit hit me as I discovered a couple of things about myself. I have a rare side effect of codeine: mood alteration. Usually I am a pretty good guy. On codeine I am a sociopath. It is usually a good idea to keep it out of my system. The second thing I learned was that I have limitations and have a tendency to push myself beyond them and hurt myself.

There are times when you must take a break and look at what and who you are. That was my wake up call to step back and look. It was a moment to rethink and remake my life. What are the things you need to stop and consider? Is this your time to step back and look at your life? Look carefully before you fall and can't get back up.

Questions

Do you ever ask the difficult questions? Why am I here? Do I make a difference to anyone? Where do I fit in? Why do men have nipples?

There comes a time in everyone's life when they have to look at where they have been and where they are going. For some of us it happens early in life and we know beyond a doubt what we are to do and how we are to do it. Others of us have to wait for that midlife crisis to ask those same questions. It has been my misfortune to go through it once as a young man and again as a not so young man. 

When I was in my early 20s I had it all figured out. Knowing what to do was very empowering. Having all the answers was very comforting and added to my rapidly growing ego. It is amazing how much smarter I was back then.

Now that I am in my mid-40s I realize how much I don't know. I must have forgotten it somewhere along the line. It seems that I have more knowledge but know less. It is such a strange feeling knowing that I don't know. That direction I was sure my life would take has taken a detour and I have no clue where I am or where I am going.

It is said that with age comes wisdom. I have come to the conclusion that wisdom is just another way of saying you know enough to know what you don't know. You know what I'm saying cause I'm not sure I know.